I’m not so great at the ‘looking in the mirror’ bit. The self-analysis; self-evaluation. I must admit, I’d prefer to remain in the dark and highly self-unaware of my faults; my weaknesses.
Which is why I always dread the self-evaluation that comes with each assignment I complete in this Masters I’m currently attempting. Admittedly, I’m getting better (I think!) and I can recognise, and even acknowledge, some aspects of my personality that I didn’t really know existed – well, on a conscious level, at least.
Like I think I’d be a hopeless manager. (And yes, I need to qualify that statement, for all of you who remember that I used to be IN management positions, as a Head of English and then as a Head of Middle School!)
In Week 1 of this semester, I completed some reading for ‘Management Issues for Information Professionals’ with Katherine Howard that profoundly changed the way I think. There were just a couple of short articles about the difference between management and leadership. One in particular I found thought-provoking enough to re-analyse my own skills in the ensuing reflection. And I realised… I’m hopeless at managing! The day-to-day, ‘Let’s continue to do this, and do it as well as we possibly can’ pales in comparison for me when compared to ‘leadership’, which is the leading of others in a different direction to the one currently travelled. The planning, the organisation, the ‘management of the change’ is I guess the element of management that I absolutely am passionate about. So yes, I am starting to accept that I’m a leader, not a manager.
Maybe that’s why I’m SOOOO in love with my job. I’m breaking new ground. No-one’s been where I’ve been, no-one’s tried doing what I’m doing. And I absolutely LOVE that. Last week I got permission to tweet and update facebook for St Paul’s as part of my job. How cool!!! (We’re @StPaulsLPS, if you’re interested! And our fb page is here – feel free to follow us!) I also set my own goals, and challenge myself to meet objectives that even the Principal and Business Manager believe are pie-in-the-sky. Maybe I’m overly enthusiastic, but I’m looking forward to seeing the results. I’m after full enrolment by the end of 2011. That’s see if it can be done!!!